The Phantom Holding Hex of Keenan Allen
Keenan Allen · SF · WR
“At 34, Allen is already part dust. The witch has almost no work to do.” — Auntie Audible
More ways the witch ruins Allen's week
- A mysterious flag erases Allen's only good play. The ref will not make eye contact.
- Allen tears an uncatchable ball out of the air and... steps out of bounds. By a toe.
75%POTENCY
-10PTS DRAINED
Season WobblerVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- A fumbled football, blessed by nobody
- A cup of hot cocoa, spilled on the depth chart
- A bag of cold gas-station nachos
- Dust from a defunct team's playbook (the Browns, probably)
Incantation
By horn of fumbled ball,
By sack that drops them all,
Allen, drop it, trip it, fall!
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Ja'Marr Chase
- Christian McCaffrey
- Amon-Ra St. Brown
- Jaxon Smith-Njigba
- CeeDee Lamb
- Justin Jefferson
- A.J. Brown
- Drake London
- Nico Collins
- George Pickens
- Malik Nabers
- Chris Olave
FAQ
How do I curse Keenan Allen in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Keenan Allen is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Keenan Allen actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.