The Hamstring Hex of Matthew Golden
Matthew Golden · GB · WR
“Golden will do something so quietly mediocre that the box score doubts he played.” — Auntie Audible
More ways the witch ruins Golden's week
- Golden gets benched in a blowout at halftime. The team then comes back. He watches. Smiling.
- Golden gets chased around the field all game by the mascot of Texas's biggest rival.
73%POTENCY
-12PTS DRAINED
Ruined BrunchVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- A forgotten fantasy trophy from 2014
- A dash of Week 17 resting-starters
- The last HD stream that wasn't buffering
- One bottle of luck. Empty. Recycled.
Incantation
By the pale blue light of the injury tag,
Golden, hear me, and start to lag,
Your best play is a flag. Your worst is the bag.
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Ja'Marr Chase
- Amon-Ra St. Brown
- Jaxon Smith-Njigba
- CeeDee Lamb
- Justin Jefferson
- A.J. Brown
- Drake London
- Josh Jacobs
- Nico Collins
- George Pickens
- Malik Nabers
- Chris Olave
FAQ
How do I curse Matthew Golden in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Matthew Golden is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Matthew Golden actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.