The Butter-Finger Hex of Matthew Golden
Matthew Golden · GB · WR
“Golden scores a 60-yard TD. It is called back for holding on a guy named Gary.” — Mother Matchup
More ways the witch ruins Golden's week
- Golden gets chased around the field all game by the mascot of Texas's biggest rival.
- A localized thunderstorm forms over Golden's stadium. Only over Golden.
84%POTENCY
-13.1PTS DRAINED
Seriously CursedVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- The last HD stream that wasn't buffering
- your opponent's lucky socks (unwashed since Week 1)
- A scorched fantasy football magazine, September issue
- A dash of Week 17 resting-starters
Incantation
Newt and bat and gridiron dust,
Golden drops one, as all fantasy must,
Questionable by noon, in the witch we trust.
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Ja'Marr Chase
- Amon-Ra St. Brown
- Jaxon Smith-Njigba
- CeeDee Lamb
- Justin Jefferson
- A.J. Brown
- Drake London
- Josh Jacobs
- Nico Collins
- George Pickens
- Malik Nabers
- Chris Olave
FAQ
How do I curse Matthew Golden in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Matthew Golden is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Matthew Golden actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.