The Shadow Coverage Hex of Matthew Golden
Matthew Golden · GB · WR
“Golden goes down with a "tweak" in a game that was already won. Never even needed him.” — Zelda the Zero-Pointer
More ways the witch ruins Golden's week
- Golden sees a depth chart rewrite 11 minutes before kickoff. His name is now in smaller font.
- Golden drops a wide-open touchdown, then celebrates anyway for 40 seconds.
85%POTENCY
-15.9PTS DRAINED
Needs a PriestVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- A single Falcons jersey, ironically worn
- A single sock, mismatched, from the Eagles locker room
- A forgotten fantasy trophy from 2014
- A tablespoon of "I told you so" (aged 7 years)
Incantation
O ancient spirits of the lost challenge flag,
Take Golden's points and put them in a bag,
Leave only a "DNP" and a sad little shrug.
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Ja'Marr Chase
- Amon-Ra St. Brown
- Jaxon Smith-Njigba
- CeeDee Lamb
- Justin Jefferson
- A.J. Brown
- Drake London
- Josh Jacobs
- Nico Collins
- George Pickens
- Malik Nabers
- Chris Olave
FAQ
How do I curse Matthew Golden in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Matthew Golden is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Matthew Golden actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.