The Inactive-at-11:58 Hex of Matthew Golden
Matthew Golden · GB · WR
“The broadcast shows Golden on the sideline with an ice pack for the entire 4th quarter.” — The Old Crone of the Red Zone
More ways the witch ruins Golden's week
- Golden tears an uncatchable ball out of the air and... steps out of bounds. By a toe.
- Golden is on the field for exactly 38% of snaps in a "rotation" only the coach understands.
76%POTENCY
-10.8PTS DRAINED
Season WobblerVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- The last HD stream that wasn't buffering
- A single tear from a Panthers fan
- Powdered tears from a kicker who "was fine" at practice
- A dash of Week 17 resting-starters
Incantation
Hocus pocus, fumble focus,
Golden's snap count, now a locust,
Waiver wire, hear my notice!
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Ja'Marr Chase
- Amon-Ra St. Brown
- Jaxon Smith-Njigba
- CeeDee Lamb
- Justin Jefferson
- A.J. Brown
- Drake London
- Josh Jacobs
- Nico Collins
- George Pickens
- Malik Nabers
- Chris Olave
FAQ
How do I curse Matthew Golden in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Matthew Golden is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Matthew Golden actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.