The Inch-Short Hex of Matthew Golden
Matthew Golden · GB · WR
“Golden will be "questionable" by Sunday morning, "inactive" by 11:58 AM, and "seen at brunch" by Monday.” — Lady Last-Minute Scratch
More ways the witch ruins Golden's week
- Golden runs a beautiful route, gets open, and the QB throws it to the other receiver. Who was covered.
- Golden finishes with 4.2 points. Not 4.0. Not 5.0. The single most insulting number.
76%POTENCY
-15.5PTS DRAINED
Seriously CursedVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- A suspicious amount of glitter and a printed injury report
- A bag of cold gas-station nachos
- A forgotten fantasy trophy from 2014
- One hair from a referee who "didn't see it"
Incantation
O ancient spirits of the lost challenge flag,
Take Golden's points and put them in a bag,
Leave only a "DNP" and a sad little shrug.
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Ja'Marr Chase
- Amon-Ra St. Brown
- Jaxon Smith-Njigba
- CeeDee Lamb
- Justin Jefferson
- A.J. Brown
- Drake London
- Josh Jacobs
- Nico Collins
- George Pickens
- Malik Nabers
- Chris Olave
FAQ
How do I curse Matthew Golden in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Matthew Golden is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Matthew Golden actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.