The Late Scratch Hex of Matthew Stafford
Matthew Stafford · LAR · QB
“Stafford gets chased around the field all game by the mascot of Georgia's biggest rival.” — Lady Last-Minute Scratch
More ways the witch ruins Stafford's week
- Ref: "Number Stafford, that's a flag." Stafford: "What flag?" Ref: "The one on the previous TD."
- Stafford will throw for 340 yards and 0 touchdowns. The efficiency of a parking ticket.
92%POTENCY
-14.2PTS DRAINED
Call an ExorcistVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- Dust from a defunct team's playbook (the Browns, probably)
- The last good thing your opponent said about their lineup
- A suspicious amount of glitter and a printed injury report
- The playbook your coordinator definitely lost
Incantation
By the pale blue light of the injury tag,
Stafford, hear me, and start to lag,
Your best play is a flag. Your worst is the bag.
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Josh Allen
- Drake Maye
- Kyren Williams
- Joe Burrow
- Caleb Williams
- Jayden Daniels
- Justin Herbert
- Dak Prescott
- Patrick Mahomes
- Trevor Lawrence
- Bo Nix
- Brock Purdy
FAQ
How do I curse Matthew Stafford in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Matthew Stafford is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Matthew Stafford actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.