The Gone-in-the-Fourth Hex of Michael Penix Jr.
Michael Penix Jr. · ATL · QB
“The play clock hits zero on Penix Jr. four separate times. Five yards. Five yards. Five yards.” — Nana Nickelback
More ways the witch ruins Penix Jr.'s week
- Penix Jr. is on the field for exactly 38% of snaps in a "rotation" only the coach understands.
- Penix Jr. gets hit on the arm in the first quarter and "plays through it" at 41% accuracy.
89%POTENCY
-9.2PTS DRAINED
Total MeltdownVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- A bottle of "I'm not superstitious" (it's empty)
- The soul of a QB who threw to the wrong team
- A fumbled football, blessed by nobody
- A single Commanders jersey, ironically worn
Incantation
Eye of Cardinals, tongue of ref,
Bring Falcons down to grief,
Penix Jr. scores zero, past belief!
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Bijan Robinson
- Josh Allen
- Drake Maye
- Joe Burrow
- Drake London
- Jayden Daniels
- Caleb Williams
- Justin Herbert
- Dak Prescott
- Patrick Mahomes
- Trevor Lawrence
- Bo Nix
FAQ
How do I curse Michael Penix Jr. in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Michael Penix Jr. is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Michael Penix Jr. actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.