The Dropped Pass Hex of Mike Evans
Mike Evans · SF · WR
“At 33, Evans is already part dust. The witch has almost no work to do.” — Zelda the Zero-Pointer
More ways the witch ruins Evans's week
- Evans gets "rested" in a week the team clinched nothing.
- Evans is on the field for exactly 38% of snaps in a "rotation" only the coach understands.
86%POTENCY
-11PTS DRAINED
Call an ExorcistVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- Dust from a defunct team's playbook (the Browns, probably)
- A single Patriots jersey, ironically worn
- A dash of Week 17 resting-starters
- A bag of cold gas-station nachos
Incantation
O ancient spirits of the lost challenge flag,
Take Evans's points and put them in a bag,
Leave only a "DNP" and a sad little shrug.
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Ja'Marr Chase
- Christian McCaffrey
- Amon-Ra St. Brown
- Jaxon Smith-Njigba
- CeeDee Lamb
- Justin Jefferson
- A.J. Brown
- Drake London
- Nico Collins
- George Pickens
- Malik Nabers
- Chris Olave
FAQ
How do I curse Mike Evans in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Mike Evans is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Mike Evans actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.