The Butter-Finger Hex of Mike Evans
Mike Evans · SF · WR
“Evans is hit with a "pre-existing condition" that was not pre-existing until just now.” — Granny Gridiron
More ways the witch ruins Evans's week
- At 33, Evans is already part dust. The witch has almost no work to do.
- Evans is already "Out" with that achilles. The witch only has to push gently.
75%POTENCY
-11PTS DRAINED
Seriously CursedVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- A fumbled football, blessed by nobody
- your opponent's lucky socks (unwashed since Week 1)
- A cup of hot cocoa, spilled on the depth chart
- A single Cowboys jersey, ironically worn
Incantation
Bubble, bubble, benched in trouble,
Evans drops it, double, double,
Hex, hex, hex, and the stat sheet's rubble!
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Ja'Marr Chase
- Christian McCaffrey
- Amon-Ra St. Brown
- Jaxon Smith-Njigba
- CeeDee Lamb
- Justin Jefferson
- A.J. Brown
- Drake London
- Nico Collins
- George Pickens
- Malik Nabers
- Chris Olave
FAQ
How do I curse Mike Evans in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Mike Evans is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Mike Evans actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.