The Inch-Short Hex of Mike Evans
Mike Evans · SF · WR
“Evans does a touchdown dance for a TD that is overturned by review. Slowly. With zoom.” — The Old Crone of the Red Zone
More ways the witch ruins Evans's week
- Evans is already "Out" with that achilles. The witch only has to push gently.
- At 33, Evans is already part dust. The witch has almost no work to do.
74%POTENCY
-19.7PTS DRAINED
Season WobblerVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- The last HD stream that wasn't buffering
- A suspicious amount of glitter and a printed injury report
- The sacred tears of a #1 waiver priority
- A forgotten fantasy trophy from 2014
Incantation
Newt and bat and gridiron dust,
Evans drops one, as all fantasy must,
Questionable by noon, in the witch we trust.
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Ja'Marr Chase
- Christian McCaffrey
- Amon-Ra St. Brown
- Jaxon Smith-Njigba
- CeeDee Lamb
- Justin Jefferson
- A.J. Brown
- Drake London
- Nico Collins
- George Pickens
- Malik Nabers
- Chris Olave
FAQ
How do I curse Mike Evans in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Mike Evans is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Mike Evans actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.