The Hamstring Hex of Parker Washington
Parker Washington · JAX · WR
“Washington gets chased around the field all game by the mascot of Penn State's biggest rival.” — Zelda the Zero-Pointer
More ways the witch ruins Washington's week
- Washington finishes with 4.2 points. Not 4.0. Not 5.0. The single most insulting number.
- A mysterious flag erases Washington's only good play. The ref will not make eye contact.
88%POTENCY
-18.8PTS DRAINED
Group Chat FuneralVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- your opponent's lucky socks (unwashed since Week 1)
- Powdered tears from a kicker who "was fine" at practice
- A suspicious amount of glitter and a printed injury report
- An unused timeout (still warm)
Incantation
Bubble, bubble, benched in trouble,
Washington drops it, double, double,
Hex, hex, hex, and the stat sheet's rubble!
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Ja'Marr Chase
- Puka Nacua
- Jaxon Smith-Njigba
- Amon-Ra St. Brown
- CeeDee Lamb
- Justin Jefferson
- A.J. Brown
- Drake London
- Nico Collins
- George Pickens
- Malik Nabers
- Chris Olave
FAQ
How do I curse Parker Washington in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Parker Washington is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Parker Washington actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.