The Phantom Flag Hex of Parker Washington
Parker Washington · JAX · WR
“Washington is hit with a "pre-existing condition" that was not pre-existing until just now.” — Mother Matchup
More ways the witch ruins Washington's week
- Washington sees a depth chart rewrite 11 minutes before kickoff. His name is now in smaller font.
- Ref: "Number Washington, that's a flag." Washington: "What flag?" Ref: "The one on the previous TD."
72%POTENCY
-11.5PTS DRAINED
Sunday RuinerVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- The last HD stream that wasn't buffering
- A tablespoon of "I told you so" (aged 7 years)
- One bottle of luck. Empty. Recycled.
- A cup of hot cocoa, spilled on the depth chart
Incantation
Bubble, bubble, benched in trouble,
Washington drops it, double, double,
Hex, hex, hex, and the stat sheet's rubble!
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Ja'Marr Chase
- Amon-Ra St. Brown
- Jaxon Smith-Njigba
- CeeDee Lamb
- Justin Jefferson
- A.J. Brown
- Drake London
- Nico Collins
- George Pickens
- Malik Nabers
- Chris Olave
- Rashee Rice
FAQ
How do I curse Parker Washington in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Parker Washington is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Parker Washington actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.