The Hamstring Hex of Woody Marks
Woody Marks · HOU · RB
“Marks gets chased around the field all game by the mascot of USC's biggest rival.” — The Hex-Pert
More ways the witch ruins Marks's week
- Marks will do something so quietly mediocre that the box score doubts he played.
- Marks finishes with 4.2 points. Not 4.0. Not 5.0. The single most insulting number.
84%POTENCY
-11.5PTS DRAINED
Needs a PriestVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- A cup of hot cocoa, spilled on the depth chart
- A shred of a Week 1 waiver wire pickup who is now a Bills fan
- A single Jets jersey, ironically worn
- Smoke from a burning depth chart
Incantation
Hocus pocus, fumble focus,
Marks's snap count, now a locust,
Waiver wire, hear my notice!
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Jahmyr Gibbs
- Bijan Robinson
- Christian McCaffrey
- Jonathan Taylor
- James Cook III
- Derrick Henry
- Saquon Barkley
- Omarion Hampton
- Ashton Jeanty
- Kyren Williams
- Chase Brown
- Kenneth Walker III
FAQ
How do I curse Woody Marks in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Woody Marks is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Woody Marks actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.