The Doink Hex of Zane Gonzalez
Zane Gonzalez · MIA · K
“Gonzalez attempts a field goal, the holder pulls it back, and gets sacked at the 12. Points: 0. Dignity: also 0.” — Auntie Audible
More ways the witch ruins Gonzalez's week
- Gonzalez gets benched in a blowout at halftime. The team then comes back. He watches. Smiling.
- Gonzalez gets one attempt: a 63-yarder into a headwind. Wide left. 0 points. 1 tear.
91%POTENCY
-13.5PTS DRAINED
Total MeltdownVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- One (1) pre-owned hamstring
- A suspicious amount of glitter and a printed injury report
- A bottle of "I'm not superstitious" (it's empty)
- A cup of hot cocoa, spilled on the depth chart
Incantation
Bubble, bubble, benched in trouble,
Gonzalez drops it, double, double,
Hex, hex, hex, and the stat sheet's rubble!
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
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FAQ
How do I curse Zane Gonzalez in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Zane Gonzalez is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Zane Gonzalez actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.