The Inactive-at-11:58 Hex of Alex Bachman
Alex Bachman · LAR · WR
“A localized thunderstorm forms over Bachman's stadium. Only over Bachman.” — Zelda the Zero-Pointer
More ways the witch ruins Bachman's week
- Bachman drops a wide-open touchdown, then celebrates anyway for 40 seconds.
- Bachman's only highlight is a block, and it is not even a good one.
91%POTENCY
-17.2PTS DRAINED
Total MeltdownVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- A used challenge flag
- A bottle of "I'm not superstitious" (it's empty)
- your opponent's lucky socks (unwashed since Week 1)
- A single Ravens jersey, ironically worn
Incantation
By horn of fumbled ball,
By sack that drops them all,
Bachman, drop it, trip it, fall!
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Ja'Marr Chase
- Amon-Ra St. Brown
- Jaxon Smith-Njigba
- CeeDee Lamb
- Justin Jefferson
- Kyren Williams
- A.J. Brown
- Drake London
- Nico Collins
- George Pickens
- Malik Nabers
- Chris Olave
FAQ
How do I curse Alex Bachman in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Alex Bachman is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Alex Bachman actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.