The Gone-in-the-Fourth Hex of Alex Bachman
Alex Bachman · LAR · WR
“Bachman gets chased around the field all game by the mascot of Wake Forest's biggest rival.” — Aunt Prevent
More ways the witch ruins Bachman's week
- Bachman gets 14 targets in garbage time with the game already lost. Points: 3.8.
- Bachman sees a depth chart rewrite 11 minutes before kickoff. His name is now in smaller font.
73%POTENCY
-13.5PTS DRAINED
Sunday RuinerVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- A single tear from a Patriots fan
- Dust from a defunct team's playbook (the Browns, probably)
- A fumbled football, blessed by nobody
- One (1) lucky coin, flipped incorrectly
Incantation
Newt and bat and gridiron dust,
Bachman drops one, as all fantasy must,
Questionable by noon, in the witch we trust.
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Ja'Marr Chase
- Amon-Ra St. Brown
- Jaxon Smith-Njigba
- CeeDee Lamb
- Justin Jefferson
- Kyren Williams
- A.J. Brown
- Drake London
- Nico Collins
- George Pickens
- Malik Nabers
- Chris Olave
FAQ
How do I curse Alex Bachman in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Alex Bachman is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Alex Bachman actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.