The Dropped Pass Hex of Alex Bachman
Alex Bachman · LAR · WR
“Bachman will do something so quietly mediocre that the box score doubts he played.” — Mother Matchup
More ways the witch ruins Bachman's week
- A localized thunderstorm forms over Bachman's stadium. Only over Bachman.
- Bachman scores a 60-yard TD. It is called back for holding on a guy named Gary.
74%POTENCY
-9.4PTS DRAINED
Needs a PriestVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- One (1) pre-owned hamstring
- One hair from a referee who "didn't see it"
- A suspicious amount of glitter and a printed injury report
- A cup of hot cocoa, spilled on the depth chart
Incantation
Hocus pocus, fumble focus,
Bachman's snap count, now a locust,
Waiver wire, hear my notice!
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Ja'Marr Chase
- Amon-Ra St. Brown
- Jaxon Smith-Njigba
- CeeDee Lamb
- Justin Jefferson
- Kyren Williams
- A.J. Brown
- Drake London
- Nico Collins
- George Pickens
- Malik Nabers
- Chris Olave
FAQ
How do I curse Alex Bachman in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Alex Bachman is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Alex Bachman actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.