The Inch-Short Hex of Alex Bachman
Alex Bachman · LAR · WR
“The broadcast shows Bachman on the sideline with an ice pack for the entire 4th quarter.” — Granny Gridiron
More ways the witch ruins Bachman's week
- Bachman will be "questionable" by Sunday morning, "inactive" by 11:58 AM, and "seen at brunch" by Monday.
- Bachman will do something so quietly mediocre that the box score doubts he played.
78%POTENCY
-12.2PTS DRAINED
Seriously CursedVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- A single Buccaneers jersey, ironically worn
- The echo of a referee saying "no catch"
- The dying breath of a waiver claim
- A forgotten fantasy trophy from 2014
Incantation
Bubble, bubble, benched in trouble,
Bachman drops it, double, double,
Hex, hex, hex, and the stat sheet's rubble!
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Ja'Marr Chase
- Amon-Ra St. Brown
- Jaxon Smith-Njigba
- CeeDee Lamb
- Justin Jefferson
- Kyren Williams
- A.J. Brown
- Drake London
- Nico Collins
- George Pickens
- Malik Nabers
- Chris Olave
FAQ
How do I curse Alex Bachman in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Alex Bachman is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Alex Bachman actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.