The Late Scratch Hex of Alex Bachman
Alex Bachman · LAR · WR
“Bachman is on the field for exactly 38% of snaps in a "rotation" only the coach understands.” — Mistress Misfire
More ways the witch ruins Bachman's week
- Bachman gets shadowed by a corner who just signed an extension and needs to prove it.
- Bachman gets a stat correction that takes away 2.4 points, 4 days later, at 3:17 AM.
88%POTENCY
-11.7PTS DRAINED
Total MeltdownVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- Smoke from a burning depth chart
- Eye of newt, toe of frog, and a "Questionable" tag
- A single tear from a Panthers fan
- Powdered tears from a kicker who "was fine" at practice
Incantation
Bachman, Bachman, in the pale moonlight,
May your target share shrink out of sight,
And may the ref not see your catch tonight.
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Ja'Marr Chase
- Amon-Ra St. Brown
- Jaxon Smith-Njigba
- CeeDee Lamb
- Justin Jefferson
- Kyren Williams
- A.J. Brown
- Drake London
- Nico Collins
- George Pickens
- Malik Nabers
- Chris Olave
FAQ
How do I curse Alex Bachman in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Alex Bachman is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Alex Bachman actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.