The Late Scratch Hex of Alex Bachman
Alex Bachman · LAR · WR
“Bachman is a game-time decision, and the decision is made by a poltergeist.” — Baba Blitz
More ways the witch ruins Bachman's week
- Bachman is on the field for exactly 38% of snaps in a "rotation" only the coach understands.
- Bachman gets 14 targets in garbage time with the game already lost. Points: 3.8.
75%POTENCY
-15PTS DRAINED
Season WobblerVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- A shred of a Week 1 waiver wire pickup who is now a Bills fan
- A single Bills jersey, ironically worn
- The ashes of a 2019 draft pick
- A scorched fantasy football magazine, September issue
Incantation
O ancient spirits of the lost challenge flag,
Take Bachman's points and put them in a bag,
Leave only a "DNP" and a sad little shrug.
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Ja'Marr Chase
- Amon-Ra St. Brown
- Jaxon Smith-Njigba
- CeeDee Lamb
- Justin Jefferson
- Kyren Williams
- A.J. Brown
- Drake London
- Nico Collins
- George Pickens
- Malik Nabers
- Chris Olave
FAQ
How do I curse Alex Bachman in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Alex Bachman is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Alex Bachman actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.