The Snap Count Hex of Alex Bachman
Alex Bachman · LAR · WR
“Bachman will be "questionable" by Sunday morning, "inactive" by 11:58 AM, and "seen at brunch" by Monday.” — Nana Nickelback
More ways the witch ruins Bachman's week
- Bachman gets quarantined by a cornerback named Cornelius who has never been beaten. Ever.
- Bachman is the primary read on every play... for the other team's film study.
80%POTENCY
-19.9PTS DRAINED
Needs a PriestVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- Smoke from a burning depth chart
- A bottle of "I'm not superstitious" (it's empty)
- A shred of a Week 1 waiver wire pickup who is now a Bills fan
- The last HD stream that wasn't buffering
Incantation
O ancient spirits of the lost challenge flag,
Take Bachman's points and put them in a bag,
Leave only a "DNP" and a sad little shrug.
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Ja'Marr Chase
- Amon-Ra St. Brown
- Jaxon Smith-Njigba
- CeeDee Lamb
- Justin Jefferson
- Kyren Williams
- A.J. Brown
- Drake London
- Nico Collins
- George Pickens
- Malik Nabers
- Chris Olave
FAQ
How do I curse Alex Bachman in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Alex Bachman is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Alex Bachman actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.