The Pass-Interference Nope Hex of Cyrus Allen
Cyrus Allen · KC · WR
“Allen gets quarantined by a cornerback named Cornelius who has never been beaten. Ever.” — Zelda the Zero-Pointer
More ways the witch ruins Allen's week
- Rookie Allen gets the traditional hazing: the "Welcome to the League" curse.
- Allen is hit with a "pre-existing condition" that was not pre-existing until just now.
91%POTENCY
-9PTS DRAINED
Total MeltdownVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- A shred of a Week 1 waiver wire pickup who is now a Bills fan
- The soul of a QB who threw to the wrong team
- A tablespoon of "I told you so" (aged 7 years)
- The sacred tears of a #1 waiver priority
Incantation
By horn of fumbled ball,
By sack that drops them all,
Allen, drop it, trip it, fall!
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Ja'Marr Chase
- Amon-Ra St. Brown
- Jaxon Smith-Njigba
- CeeDee Lamb
- Justin Jefferson
- A.J. Brown
- Drake London
- Kenneth Walker III
- Nico Collins
- George Pickens
- Malik Nabers
- Chris Olave
FAQ
How do I curse Cyrus Allen in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Cyrus Allen is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Cyrus Allen actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.