The Sunday Night Fade Hex of Dallas Cowboys
Dallas Cowboys defense
“The Cowboys will give up a touchdown to a tight end who was a high school wrestler. Net -2 points.” — Sister Sack
More ways the witch ruins Dallas Cowboys defense's week
- The Cowboys defense is "disguising coverages". The disguise is a clown nose. Fully see-through.
- The Cowboys defense allows a 99-yard drive, a 71-yard punt return, and a trick play from the 1989 playbook.
83%POTENCY
-9.5PTS DRAINED
Seriously CursedVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- A suspicious amount of glitter and a printed injury report
- One bottle of luck. Empty. Recycled.
- A fumbled football, blessed by nobody
- A forgotten fantasy trophy from 2014
Incantation
Newt and bat and gridiron dust,
Cowboys drops one, as all fantasy must,
Questionable by noon, in the witch we trust.
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- CeeDee Lamb
- George Pickens
- Javonte Williams
- Dak Prescott
- Brandon Aubrey
- Jake Ferguson
- Kendre Miller
- Ryan Flournoy
- Michael Trigg
- KaVontae Turpin
- Houston Texans
- New England Patriots
FAQ
How do I curse Dallas Cowboys defense in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Dallas Cowboys defense is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Dallas Cowboys defense actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.