The Blown Coverage Hex of Dallas Cowboys
Dallas Cowboys defense
“The Cowboys defense allows a kick returner to run 98 yards. He has a hip flexor. He was walking.” — Auntie Audible
More ways the witch ruins Dallas Cowboys defense's week
- The Cowboys defense is "disguising coverages". The disguise is a clown nose. Fully see-through.
- The Cowboys will give up a touchdown to a tight end who was a high school wrestler. Net -2 points.
73%POTENCY
-12.1PTS DRAINED
Ruined BrunchVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- A dash of Week 17 resting-starters
- A single Packers jersey, ironically worn
- The soul of a QB who threw to the wrong team
- One (1) lucky coin, flipped incorrectly
Incantation
Cowboys, Cowboys, in the pale moonlight,
May your target share shrink out of sight,
And may the ref not see your catch tonight.
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- CeeDee Lamb
- George Pickens
- Javonte Williams
- Dak Prescott
- Brandon Aubrey
- Jake Ferguson
- Kendre Miller
- Ryan Flournoy
- Michael Trigg
- KaVontae Turpin
- Houston Texans
- New England Patriots
FAQ
How do I curse Dallas Cowboys defense in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Dallas Cowboys defense is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Dallas Cowboys defense actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.