The Sunday Night Fade Hex of Jake Bates
Jake Bates · DET · K
“Bates finishes with 4.2 points. Not 4.0. Not 5.0. The single most insulting number.” — Auntie Audible
More ways the witch ruins Bates's week
- Coach goes for it on 4th-and-2 every time Bates trots out. He watches from the bench like a retiree.
- The broadcast shows Bates on the sideline with an ice pack for the entire 4th quarter.
78%POTENCY
-15.3PTS DRAINED
Needs a PriestVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- An unused timeout (still warm)
- The last HD stream that wasn't buffering
- A used challenge flag
- One hair from a referee who "didn't see it"
Incantation
Double, double, toil and trouble,
Bates's stat line, now a rubble,
Inactive by kickoff, pop that bubble!
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Jahmyr Gibbs
- Amon-Ra St. Brown
- Jameson Williams
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- Jared Goff
- Brandon Aubrey
- Cameron Dicker
- Jason Myers
- Ka'imi Fairbairn
- Cam Little
- Chris Boswell
- Evan McPherson
FAQ
How do I curse Jake Bates in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Jake Bates is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Jake Bates actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.