The Doink Hex of Jake Bates
Jake Bates · DET · K
“The wind in the stadium is 22 mph. Bates is aware. The ball is aware. Only the ball cares.” — The Hex-Pert
More ways the witch ruins Bates's week
- Bates will be "questionable" by Sunday morning, "inactive" by 11:58 AM, and "seen at brunch" by Monday.
- Bates gets chased around the field all game by the mascot of Arkansas's biggest rival.
92%POTENCY
-18.8PTS DRAINED
Call an ExorcistVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- A screenshot of your opponent's trash talk, face down
- The last HD stream that wasn't buffering
- The ashes of a 2019 draft pick
- The soul of a QB who threw to the wrong team
Incantation
Eye of Falcons, tongue of ref,
Bring Lions down to grief,
Bates scores zero, past belief!
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Jahmyr Gibbs
- Amon-Ra St. Brown
- Jameson Williams
- Sam LaPorta
- Jared Goff
- Brandon Aubrey
- Cameron Dicker
- Jason Myers
- Ka'imi Fairbairn
- Cam Little
- Chris Boswell
- Harrison Mevis
FAQ
How do I curse Jake Bates in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Jake Bates is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Jake Bates actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.