The Doink Hex of Jake Bates
Jake Bates · DET · K
“Bates gets chased around the field all game by the mascot of Arkansas's biggest rival.” — Nana Nickelback
More ways the witch ruins Bates's week
- Bates hits the upright twice, then the other upright, then somehow the crossbar from the side.
- Bates will be perfect on extra points and absolutely nothing else.
78%POTENCY
-14.8PTS DRAINED
Needs a PriestVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- Eye of newt, toe of frog, and a "Questionable" tag
- The last HD stream that wasn't buffering
- A forgotten fantasy trophy from 2014
- One bottle of luck. Empty. Recycled.
Incantation
Eye of Saints, tongue of ref,
Bring Lions down to grief,
Bates scores zero, past belief!
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Jahmyr Gibbs
- Amon-Ra St. Brown
- Jameson Williams
- Sam LaPorta
- Jared Goff
- Brandon Aubrey
- Cameron Dicker
- Jason Myers
- Ka'imi Fairbairn
- Cam Little
- Chris Boswell
- Harrison Mevis
FAQ
How do I curse Jake Bates in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Jake Bates is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Jake Bates actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.