The Late Scratch Hex of Jake Bates
Jake Bates · DET · K
“Bates gets benched in a blowout at halftime. The team then comes back. He watches. Smiling.” — Mother Matchup
More ways the witch ruins Bates's week
- Bates gets chased around the field all game by the mascot of Arkansas's biggest rival.
- Bates will do something so quietly mediocre that the box score doubts he played.
83%POTENCY
-17.5PTS DRAINED
Needs a PriestVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- Powdered tears from a kicker who "was fine" at practice
- A cup of hot cocoa, spilled on the depth chart
- A single tear from a Jets fan
- The soul of a QB who threw to the wrong team
Incantation
Eye of Bills, tongue of ref,
Bring Lions down to grief,
Bates scores zero, past belief!
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Jahmyr Gibbs
- Amon-Ra St. Brown
- Jameson Williams
- Sam LaPorta
- Jared Goff
- Brandon Aubrey
- Cameron Dicker
- Jason Myers
- Ka'imi Fairbairn
- Cam Little
- Chris Boswell
- Evan McPherson
FAQ
How do I curse Jake Bates in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Jake Bates is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Jake Bates actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.