The Hamstring Hex of Keenan Allen
Keenan Allen · SF · WR
“At 34, Allen is already part dust. The witch has almost no work to do.” — Aunt Prevent
More ways the witch ruins Allen's week
- Allen scores 0 fantasy points and is somehow also responsible for 2 turnovers.
- Allen gets chased around the field all game by the mascot of California's biggest rival.
84%POTENCY
-9.4PTS DRAINED
Season WobblerVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- A single sock, mismatched, from the Buccaneers locker room
- The playbook your coordinator definitely lost
- Eye of newt, toe of frog, and a "Questionable" tag
- An unused timeout (still warm)
Incantation
Hocus pocus, fumble focus,
Allen's snap count, now a locust,
Waiver wire, hear my notice!
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Ja'Marr Chase
- Christian McCaffrey
- Jaxon Smith-Njigba
- Amon-Ra St. Brown
- CeeDee Lamb
- Justin Jefferson
- A.J. Brown
- Drake London
- Nico Collins
- George Pickens
- Malik Nabers
- Chris Olave
FAQ
How do I curse Keenan Allen in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Keenan Allen is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Keenan Allen actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.