The Out-of-Bounds Hex of Keenan Allen
Keenan Allen · SF · WR
“At 34, Allen is already part dust. The witch has almost no work to do.” — Granny Gridiron
More ways the witch ruins Allen's week
- Allen drops a wide-open touchdown, then celebrates anyway for 40 seconds.
- Allen is the primary read on every play... for the other team's film study.
91%POTENCY
-12.4PTS DRAINED
Total MeltdownVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- A used challenge flag
- One (1) lucky coin, flipped incorrectly
- A single Packers jersey, ironically worn
- One hair from a referee who "didn't see it"
Incantation
By the pale blue light of the injury tag,
Allen, hear me, and start to lag,
Your best play is a flag. Your worst is the bag.
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Ja'Marr Chase
- Christian McCaffrey
- Amon-Ra St. Brown
- Jaxon Smith-Njigba
- CeeDee Lamb
- Justin Jefferson
- A.J. Brown
- Drake London
- Nico Collins
- George Pickens
- Malik Nabers
- Chris Olave
FAQ
How do I curse Keenan Allen in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Keenan Allen is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Keenan Allen actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.