The Late Scratch Hex of Michael Penix Jr.
Michael Penix Jr. · ATL · QB
“Penix Jr. will throw for 340 yards and 0 touchdowns. The efficiency of a parking ticket.” — Madame Waiver Wire
More ways the witch ruins Penix Jr.'s week
- Coach will call 4 straight handoffs inside the 5. For Penix Jr., the end zone is a rumor.
- Penix Jr. gets a stat correction that takes away 2.4 points, 4 days later, at 3:17 AM.
84%POTENCY
-16.8PTS DRAINED
Needs a PriestVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- One hair from a referee who "didn't see it"
- Dust from a defunct team's playbook (the Browns, probably)
- A scorched fantasy football magazine, September issue
- One bottle of luck. Empty. Recycled.
Incantation
O ancient spirits of the lost challenge flag,
Take Penix Jr.'s points and put them in a bag,
Leave only a "DNP" and a sad little shrug.
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Bijan Robinson
- Josh Allen
- Drake Maye
- Joe Burrow
- Drake London
- Caleb Williams
- Jayden Daniels
- Justin Herbert
- Dak Prescott
- Patrick Mahomes
- Trevor Lawrence
- Bo Nix
FAQ
How do I curse Michael Penix Jr. in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Michael Penix Jr. is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Michael Penix Jr. actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.