The Butter-Finger Hex of Mike Evans
Mike Evans · SF · WR
“Evans's coach discovers the run game at the exact moment Evans was due a breakout.” — Granny Gridiron
More ways the witch ruins Evans's week
- Evans gets quarantined by a cornerback named Cornelius who has never been beaten. Ever.
- At 33, Evans is already part dust. The witch has almost no work to do.
80%POTENCY
-13.3PTS DRAINED
Season WobblerVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- A single sock, mismatched, from the Vikings locker room
- A shred of a Week 1 waiver wire pickup who is now a Bills fan
- One (1) pre-owned hamstring
- The sacred tears of a #1 waiver priority
Incantation
O ancient spirits of the lost challenge flag,
Take Evans's points and put them in a bag,
Leave only a "DNP" and a sad little shrug.
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Ja'Marr Chase
- Christian McCaffrey
- Amon-Ra St. Brown
- Jaxon Smith-Njigba
- CeeDee Lamb
- Justin Jefferson
- A.J. Brown
- Drake London
- Nico Collins
- George Pickens
- Malik Nabers
- Chris Olave
FAQ
How do I curse Mike Evans in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Mike Evans is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Mike Evans actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.