The Gone-in-the-Fourth Hex of Mike Evans
Mike Evans · SF · WR
“Evans is already "Out" with that achilles. The witch only has to push gently.” — Hexcellent Hilda
More ways the witch ruins Evans's week
- Evans finishes with 4.2 points. Not 4.0. Not 5.0. The single most insulting number.
- Evans tears an uncatchable ball out of the air and... steps out of bounds. By a toe.
76%POTENCY
-12.2PTS DRAINED
Needs a PriestVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- Dust from a defunct team's playbook (the Browns, probably)
- The sacred tears of a #1 waiver priority
- A bottle of "I'm not superstitious" (it's empty)
- One (1) pre-owned hamstring
Incantation
Bubble, bubble, benched in trouble,
Evans drops it, double, double,
Hex, hex, hex, and the stat sheet's rubble!
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Ja'Marr Chase
- Christian McCaffrey
- Amon-Ra St. Brown
- Jaxon Smith-Njigba
- CeeDee Lamb
- Justin Jefferson
- A.J. Brown
- Drake London
- Nico Collins
- George Pickens
- Malik Nabers
- Chris Olave
FAQ
How do I curse Mike Evans in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Mike Evans is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Mike Evans actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.