The Doink Hex of Zane Gonzalez
Zane Gonzalez · MIA · K
“The crowd chants "WIDE LEFT" for Gonzalez. Gonzalez does not ignore it. Neither does the ball.” — Mother Matchup
More ways the witch ruins Gonzalez's week
- Gonzalez hits the upright twice, then the other upright, then somehow the crossbar from the side.
- Gonzalez gets chased around the field all game by the mascot of Arizona State's biggest rival.
81%POTENCY
-9.4PTS DRAINED
Season WobblerVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- A tablespoon of "I told you so" (aged 7 years)
- A cup of hot cocoa, spilled on the depth chart
- One bottle of luck. Empty. Recycled.
- The last HD stream that wasn't buffering
Incantation
Bubble, bubble, benched in trouble,
Gonzalez drops it, double, double,
Hex, hex, hex, and the stat sheet's rubble!
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Brandon Aubrey
- Cameron Dicker
- Jason Myers
- Ka'imi Fairbairn
- Cam Little
- Jake Bates
- Chris Boswell
- Evan McPherson
- Harrison Mevis
- Harrison Butker
- Andy Borregales
- Kaytron Allen
FAQ
How do I curse Zane Gonzalez in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Zane Gonzalez is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Zane Gonzalez actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.