The Inactive-at-11:58 Hex of Zane Gonzalez
Zane Gonzalez · MIA · K
“Gonzalez finishes with 4.2 points. Not 4.0. Not 5.0. The single most insulting number.” — Mistress Misfire
More ways the witch ruins Gonzalez's week
- Gonzalez hits the upright twice, then the other upright, then somehow the crossbar from the side.
- Gonzalez gets chased around the field all game by the mascot of Arizona State's biggest rival.
86%POTENCY
-15.5PTS DRAINED
Total MeltdownVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- A tablespoon of "I told you so" (aged 7 years)
- One (1) pre-owned hamstring
- A single Broncos jersey, ironically worn
- A scorched fantasy football magazine, September issue
Incantation
Gonzalez, Gonzalez, in the pale moonlight,
May your target share shrink out of sight,
And may the ref not see your catch tonight.
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Brandon Aubrey
- Cameron Dicker
- Jason Myers
- Ka'imi Fairbairn
- Cam Little
- Jake Bates
- Chris Boswell
- Evan McPherson
- Harrison Mevis
- Harrison Butker
- Andy Borregales
- Kaytron Allen
FAQ
How do I curse Zane Gonzalez in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Zane Gonzalez is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Zane Gonzalez actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.