The Doink Hex of Zane Gonzalez
Zane Gonzalez · MIA · K
“Coach goes for it on 4th-and-2 every time Gonzalez trots out. He watches from the bench like a retiree.” — Aunt Prevent
More ways the witch ruins Gonzalez's week
- Gonzalez gets benched in a blowout at halftime. The team then comes back. He watches. Smiling.
- Gonzalez goes down with a "tweak" in a game that was already won. Never even needed him.
86%POTENCY
-13.7PTS DRAINED
Total MeltdownVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- A tablespoon of "I told you so" (aged 7 years)
- A forgotten fantasy trophy from 2014
- A single Bears jersey, ironically worn
- One bottle of luck. Empty. Recycled.
Incantation
Newt and bat and gridiron dust,
Gonzalez drops one, as all fantasy must,
Questionable by noon, in the witch we trust.
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
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- Cam Little
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- Chris Boswell
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- Harrison Mevis
- Harrison Butker
- Andy Borregales
- Kaytron Allen
FAQ
How do I curse Zane Gonzalez in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Zane Gonzalez is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Zane Gonzalez actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.