The Upright Hex of Zane Gonzalez
Zane Gonzalez · MIA · K
“The wind in the stadium is 22 mph. Gonzalez is aware. The ball is aware. Only the ball cares.” — The Old Crone of the Red Zone
More ways the witch ruins Gonzalez's week
- Gonzalez is hit with a "pre-existing condition" that was not pre-existing until just now.
- Ref: "Number Gonzalez, that's a flag." Gonzalez: "What flag?" Ref: "The one on the previous TD."
82%POTENCY
-19.9PTS DRAINED
Needs a PriestVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- One (1) pre-owned hamstring
- A screenshot of your opponent's trash talk, face down
- A dash of Week 17 resting-starters
- One hair from a referee who "didn't see it"
Incantation
Newt and bat and gridiron dust,
Gonzalez drops one, as all fantasy must,
Questionable by noon, in the witch we trust.
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Brandon Aubrey
- Cameron Dicker
- Jason Myers
- Ka'imi Fairbairn
- Cam Little
- Jake Bates
- Chris Boswell
- Harrison Mevis
- Harrison Butker
- Evan McPherson
- Andy Borregales
- Kaytron Allen
FAQ
How do I curse Zane Gonzalez in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Zane Gonzalez is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Zane Gonzalez actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.