The Wide Left Hex of Zane Gonzalez
Zane Gonzalez · MIA · K
“A mysterious flag erases Gonzalez's only good play. The ref will not make eye contact.” — Mistress Misfire
More ways the witch ruins Gonzalez's week
- Coach goes for it on 4th-and-2 every time Gonzalez trots out. He watches from the bench like a retiree.
- Gonzalez is a game-time decision, and the decision is made by a poltergeist.
72%POTENCY
-12.4PTS DRAINED
Ruined BrunchVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- A suspicious amount of glitter and a printed injury report
- A fumbled football, blessed by nobody
- The playbook your coordinator definitely lost
- A bottle of "I'm not superstitious" (it's empty)
Incantation
Eye of Bengals, tongue of ref,
Bring Dolphins down to grief,
Gonzalez scores zero, past belief!
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Brandon Aubrey
- Cameron Dicker
- Jason Myers
- Ka'imi Fairbairn
- Cam Little
- Jake Bates
- Chris Boswell
- Harrison Mevis
- Harrison Butker
- Evan McPherson
- Andy Borregales
- Kaytron Allen
FAQ
How do I curse Zane Gonzalez in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Zane Gonzalez is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Zane Gonzalez actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.